KatrinaWightman.com

The Wooden Baby in the Grass

We pulled to the side of the road; I was nauseous again. That is what happens when you have a life growing inside of you. When the car stopped; I opened the door and leaned out. Just as swiftly as it came the nausea passed and I look down at the green grass of spring before me. There nestled in the soft grass was a wooden baby in a papoose. Relief and peace spread through me the moment I saw it. As I reached out to retrieve it I had no doubts it was a sign, the sign I needed.

I was young and in a relationship which clearly wasn’t going to endure. At first I was hopefully that we would work out and that this baby I was carrying was the going to usher us into adulthood and inspire us to be better people.For me it did. The moment the test stick formed a heart; I had given mine and a vow to the baby growing inside me. I am committed to you.
The day my cousin and I pulled to the side of the road was the day I realized that I would be raising this child alone and it was in fact just a matter of time before the relationship ended. At the time the wooden baby in a papoose was a sign to me that my baby and I were going to be okay and that everything would work out, and it did. The road wasn’t an easy one but there were many happy times and all the struggles made us stronger.

As I write this nineteen year later the unborn baby is now an amazing young woman and If I were to describe my life now and all its blessing to the my younger soon to be mother self it would be hard for to her to image it. The wooden baby in the grass gave her hope for a better life and the strength to work for it and for that I am ever grateful.

Dr Who and Blues Dancing

Jillian and Tulsa Tardis — Jillian and the Tulsa Tardis

This weekend I tried out my dancing legs for the first time since I broke my ankle in December; a mere four days after I started walking. I ambitious but I kept the steps slow and simple. They received there first test at the Lindy Reunion event or Lindy Rx dance on Friday night. It was a dance with a mix of Lindy and blues dancing and was held at the one of the local VFW’s. Lindy is on my list of dances to learn and its often fast passed swinging movements seemed a bit out of reach. I was hoping for a slow blues song to start. I was sitting with my friend when a guy asked me to dance. I was telling him about my ankle when my friend chimed in with “Don’t break her we just got her out of the shop”. He agreed to be careful as he led me onto the dance floor. The steps I performed were not my most impressive but it felt marvelous to be dancing again. Essentially, my techniques consisted of some side touch steps while in open frame. It made me really want to dance with my instructor who I have been dancing with for about a year. Due to his schedule of events for the weekend he wasn’t sure he would make it to the dance at my place on Sunday. His studio was hosting a Valentine’s Day dance on Saturday night and although I was tired from, the festivities on Friday, I decided to go to his studio on Saturday in order to dance with him. I requested a slow blues song and we danced. I was a little nervous but it went well. Dancing with him is comfortable and I was able to safely try some moves. It was a perfect way to test the ankle. I called it a night after that and decided to rest up for the party at my house the following night.

The finally dance of the weekend was the Blue Box Dance at my house and I was very excited to be hosting. They decided to call it the Blue Box party because the Tulsa Tardis was going to be there. The Tulsa Tardis is a life-sized Tardis reproduction designed to be as authentic as possible included hardware shipped over from the UK. I of course used my Dr. who table cloth and made Dr. Who themed snacks. My friend Stefanie loaned us some decorations. Unfortunately, she wasn’t able to attend as she was the only one of her five person family not dealing with the stomach bug.

I found several recipes for sweets online but I was having difficulty finding savory ones. I decided to make my own recipes. I was thinking of something cheesy shaped like sonic screwdrivers. I ended up making cheese biscuit sonic screwdrivers and maple mustard bacon bow ties. My daughter Jillian and my friend Shawna come over to help me setup and cook. The food was a hit and I also danced several more dances as I was feeling more confident after my test run with my instructor. I even managed to get my daughter dancing. Sad to say I didn’t get any good pictures of the food but to make up for that there will be a link to my YouTube channel with a how to on the savory recipes posted soon!

Shine your light on me

I consider myself a positive person and it’s something I strive to be every day. There are times in life when that can be difficult. The end of 2014 and the beginning of 2015 has been one of those times. A few days before Christmas I broke my ankle and on the 30th of December, the day before I was supposed to leave on a week and half long vacation, I had surgery to install a plate and two screws to fix my broken ankle. I missed the cruise and several other events since then. I went from super active to inactive and my body not be able to keep up with everything my brain wanted to do. This was a real struggle for me but I still tried to stay positive. Then in January I lost my Granny. A woman I adored. I grew up around her and even when my life took me to other places we stayed close. In fact in 2013 I moved in with her for several weeks in December to provide around the clock care allowing her to spend one more holiday home before moving to a skilled care facility. It became very difficult to stay positive. I was struggling to find some way to get back on track when I came across a YouTube video by one of my favorite personalities, the Kid President. His videos are inspiring and it was just what I needed. It was called “HEY INTERNET! LET’S #MakeItHappy! From Kid President.” by Soul Pancake. You should check it out.

Sometimes when it is really dark we need someone else to shine a light in order for us to find ours. Thank you Kid President for helping me to find my light! Once you find your light shine it on your life and look for all the good things. Maybe even use your light to help someone else find theirs!

The Polar Express Ride

I took my first train ride in December. I rode on the eastern flyer train which had been temporarily transformed into the Polar Express. I purchased tickets months before immediately after seeing the announcement. I couldn’t pass up a chance to ride on the polar express. I bought two tickets one for me and one for a kid; even though I didn’t have a kid of my own to take. Well, I mean I have a kid but I didn’t think at eighteen she would be all that excited about going with me. Anyway I wanted to avoid any awkwardness that would occur if I was a lone adult without a kid. Besides a kid would share in my excitement making the trip more fun. My friend Stefanie graciously lent me her daughter for the trip and as I hoped she was as excited as I was about the train ride. We arrived at the train station decked out in our favorite pajamas. Yes, I am wearing bat girl pj’s.

My bubbly sidekick and I boarded the train and climbed the stairs to our seats. We were seated in a booth across from a mother and her daughter. There were cookies wrapped in white paper and polar express themed mugs set on the table before us. Anya wanted to eat her cookie right away. I pointed out that we did not have anything to drink yet and asked if she wanted to wait until we had our hot chocolate. She said she would be ok without a drink. That worked for me so I told her to go for it. She hastily unwrapped the sugar cookie and took a big bite. A huge smile spread across her face. As the train pulled slowly away from the station hot chocolate was served by two girls dressed in chef hats and coats. It was served in white Styrofoam cups that slipped nice into our mugs. Anya immediately tasted hers and declared it was just the right temperature for drinking. The rest of us joined her for our first tastes.

It was some of the best hot chocolate I have ever had. I then unwrapped my sugar cookie and gave half to Anya as all that remained of hers was crumbs. As we enjoyed are treats the polar express story played on the speakers. The conductor made his way down the car with his star shaped hole punch. He was punching the golden tickets, the children had received upon arrival, with either there name or the word believe. Anya chose her name. The conductor rapidly punched the ticket sending a flurry of golden stars towards the table. Soon golden confetti blanketed the table and was scooped up by both girls at the table as prized souvenirs. All the while the train chugged along to the Oklahoma North Pole, as I called it. We arrived at the North Pole in short order and Santa and the elves enthusiastically greeted us. The train came to a stop and Santa and the elves boarded the train. Santa passed out little silver bells to the kids. As the train began to roll back toward the station the song jingle bells came on the train speakers. The children began to shake their bells along with the song.
Soon we arrived back at the depot. All smiles we exited the train and headed towards the gift shop to grab a couple of souvenirs. Those purchased we made our way to the town square to say a quick hello to Mrs. Clause and grab some kettle corn for the drive home. It was a thoroughly enjoyable outing that I would recommend. Although I would suggest going at night as the daylight made it a little difficult to embrace the reality of the North Pole. I also really enjoyed the train ride itself and I will definitely be taking another one in the future!

Death becomes us

A phone rings.
Come home.
Across the miles we all run.
At her bedside we gather.
The center of our family.
Bringing us together one last time.

Past differences forgotten.
Hanging on every breath.
Holding ours and each other.
A circle of love.

Promises.
The bonds bound by your love
are woven in our hearts
and will not break.

Permission.
Rest your weary body.
Well lived dear one.
One final breath.
Tears and hugs.
Sleep Sweet.
Our Blue Angel.

Wedding Poem

When I married my husband my daughter was thirteen years old. My daughter was included in the ceremony because we were becoming a family not just a couple. I wrote the poem below to signify the creation of our family and what it meant.

Three sets of eyes to see you as you are,
Three sets of hands to hug and lift you up,
Three smiles to brighten your day,
Three laughs to wash your cares away,
Three hearts that have found a home,
In one family they now call their own.

Katrina Wightman

One Runner’s Inspiration

Below is a short story I wrote when I was a junior in High School unedited by my adult self.

One Runner’s Inspiration

I fell exhausted on to the soft grass of the football field surrounded by the track. Clasping my hands behind my head, trying to catch my breath before the coach instructed us to run again, I wondered where I would get the energy to continue. I decided to start stretching, so at least my muscles would be prepared for what was to come. As I began stretching, still filled with exhaustion, I tried to remember what it was that forced me to push myself to continue even at times like these. Then I remember back to two years ago. My running sure has changed since then. Back then I was in the seventh grade and full of energy. I would never have been tired after the little running we had just done. I guess these changes should be expected as a person matures. At that moment, I remembered what it was about seventh grade track that was so inspiring that it compelled me even now to strive onward.

That day was like any other. I followed the same routine I had mapped out for myself since the first day of school. The bell had just rung. I a long with the other girls was dressing in the locker room. Today we would run to high school and back. I had a slightly tense feeling about the run ahead. This girl in my class and I had been in close competition for the past couple of runs. We had each won once. Today would decide who would truly be number one. I pulled the bow tighter on the shoe I had just finished tying and walked into the gymnasium. I found spot on the floor and began stretching and mentally preparing myself for the run. The coach came out of her office and told us to go to the stop sign and line up. The stop sign was our start and finish line. I lined up with everybody else and moved in to my starting position. With my left leg forward, back bent slightly, had level and eyes straight ahead, I was fully concentrating.
The coach shouted, ” On your mark, get set, and go!”. I burst into a sprint, but as we rounded the first corner, I settled into a steady pace. I looked beside me and there she was, just a s I expected. The first mile she stayed right beside me. Now the pole which was our turn around point at the high school was in sight. There was one mile left and she was still there beside me pushing me onward. We were side by side the entire way. We turned the corner and saw the coach. With only tow blocks left the other girls started to kick (a very hard sprint). I usually waited until the last block to kick, but I had to stay with her. Then there was one block left. We pressed each other faster and faster, still. Neither one of us gave an inch. Now every muscle in my body ached. Just then a numbness shot through my entire body. I surged with energy as I flew across the finish line.

Afterward, we walked over to the coach and she told us we had tied. We laughed and just looked at each other. As we walked away from the coach, I told her about the experience I had and she told me she had the same experience. We agreed it was the most amazing feeling either of us had ever had.

I now know that the feeling is called runner’s nova, or the runner’s high and is even called catching the cheetahs. Runner’s high is the greatest experience a runner can have. Endorphins are natural painkillers which are released into your body and give you a numb feeling along with a rush of adrenalin.

Once Again, finding my inspiration, I picked myself up off the ground and headed for the starting line. When the coach told me to start running, I took off with my new found energy and began to chase those cheetahs’ hoping to catch them one more time.

Car Wash

The Car Wash is one of the small pleasures I indulge in from time to time. For a few buck I can be magically transported back to my childhood and get a clean car.
I pay my money and drive around the curve to the car wash tunnel entrance. The car wash attendant directs me forward, after my car is securely on the tracks he directs me to the sign. The sign instructs me to put my car in neutral and keep my hands off the wheel. The attendant then offers me a sucker. I accept the sucker and roll the window up with gleefully anticipation of what is to come. I place the sucker in my mouth and the sweet fruity flavor glides across my tongue. My car moves forward and a light mist begins to pepper the windshield. Then the long blue strips of cloth begin their rhythmic drumming on my car and I am transport back to my child hood. As my car inches forward the smell of liquid sunshine and candy envelops me. The swirls of neon colors dance on my windshields bringing a smile to my face. The swirling brushes roar to life brushing away dust and my cares for a moment.
My car slow makes it way out of the tunnel. It is now sparkling clean and I feel happy and refreshed. What a lovely moment in a hectic day!

My Mom

The list of people, who have been major influences in my life, would not be complete without telling you about my mother. She is an amazing woman who has touched my life in so many ways.
I grew up in a small town with little diversity and where prejudices were commonplace. Yet, due to my mother’s influence, I grew up to become an open minded, tolerant person who believes diversity is what makes the world an interesting and wonderful place. From her I also learned the importance of doing the right thing even when it is not easy. She showed me not just in words, but also by her actions. For example, one time she drove, twenty miles back to a bank when she discovered they had given her twenty dollars too much.

Through my mother’s stories and first hand examples, I learned the importance of standing up for other people. One of my favorite stories occurred when my mother was sixteen and my aunt (her youngest sister) was eleven. My aunt came to the car on the last day of school in tears. She said she was not going to the next grade with her friends. There was no apparent reason for it she had passed all of her subjects. My Granny was reluctant to challenge the schools authority, so my mother marched in to find out what was going on. The teacher had decided that my aunt was too immature emotionally. However, she failed to consult anyone and decided on her own to hold my aunt back. With a few minutes of discussion with the teacher, my mother was able to return to the car and wipe the tears from aunt eyes. She had convinced the teacher to let her sister progress with her friends. Although, it was a small thing, it was a life changing event for my aunt. For all the things you have taught me and continue you to teach me, Thank you Mom!

Coach

My junior high track coach was another influential person in my life. Her name was Coach Holt. At my first track meet I ran hard and tried my best, but still came in second to last place. I was prepared for her to express her disappointment or anger at the finish, but she did not. Instead, Coach Holt said that by the end of the year, I would win district. I could not believe it. What could she have possibly seen to make her believe that I was capable of winning when I had just finished next to last? It was definitely not natural talent. At that point, it didn’t matter what she saw. That she saw something, that she believed in me that was enough to make me start believing in myself. She didn’t just plant the seed of self-confidence; she taught me that self-confidence and desire to achieve are just the starting point. Success comes through hard work, dedication, and determination, and continually pushing yourself to do better. I trained hard and ran almost every day. I would run down my stairs and up the hills at my house, if my parents were not home to take me to the track. All my hard work paid off. I won district that year in both events I competed in. Not only did I learn the value of hard work, I also learned the importance of believing in yourself and other people.